Mark Twain and I are just like THAT

   Five days a week, in the late morning, I have a class of eighth-graders. That's right: just before lunch.
  Those of you who also have such classes, or are parents of eighth-graders, have already reacted to that.
  The rest of you will just have to try to follow along, drawing on your own memories of being 13.
  Yes, at 11:45 they are hungry, and restless, and full of ideas.
  Last week, they were all involved in a Social Studies project of the kind I particularly like, which involved each of them researching a particular person prominent in late 19th or early 20th century American history and then impersonating the research subject, wearing a costume and answering questions and so on.
  Oh, I do love this stuff!
   Even though some of them drag their feet just a bit.
  Responding to a general appeal from their  history teacher I brought in outfits and props for a number of students.
  Possibly the most reluctant was Joseph Pulitzer, who told me repeatedly how much he hated the suit I'd provided for him.
  "I hate that tux!"
   "Um, it's a suit, not a tux.  I could bring in a tux if you want."*
   "I don't think so. I hate that suit."
   Well, okay then.
   Far more agreeable were the girls (Jane Addams, Lucretia Mott), who apparently found it far less onerous to be obliged to dress in antiquated styles.  And they also tended to be far readier to explain their characters.
   But I must admit a fondness for Mark Twain... well, yes, the writer, but also his impersonator, who said he'd read "Tom Sawyer" some time ago, and asked to take out library copies of "Tom Sawyer" and "Huckleberry Finn" because "they're more colorful" than the copies I'd brought from home for him to use.
    Literally, more colorful.  As in, having brighter covers, with pictures. (The editions I have are bound in dark green.)
   "I think they'll attract more attention," he said savvily. 
    Once he had the books signed out in his name, though, he had second thoughts.
   "Wait a minute... maybe I don't want to attract attention.  If people come over to my table, they'll ask me questions."
   Isn't that the general idea?
   "Well, yeah, but I don't want to answer questions."
   Why not?
  "What if they ask questions I can't answer?"
   OK, let's practice.  What is your real name?
   "Samuel Langhorne Clemens."
   When were you born?
   "1835.  In Missouri."
   And you are famous for....
   "Writing books."
   How many books have you written?
   "A lot."
   Which one is your favorite of all those books you've written?...
   "__________________________???"
   'Joan of Arc'.  Remember that.  Twain always said 'Joan of Arc' was his favorite.  See?  You'll do fine.

   Naturally I had to quiz Mr. Twain when I encountered him later in the auditorium.
   What's your favorite book again?
   " 'Tom Sawyer'."
   'Joan of Arc'!  Remember?
   "Ohhh.... I thought you meant me, which of the books here is my favorite.  And I really liked 'Tom Sawyer.'  I read it when I was little.  In fact, it's probably the last book I read."
   So you liked it so much you figured, 'This is the best book I will ever encounter; I'd better stop now while I'm ahead'?
   "Pretty much."

   How can you NOT love this stuff?



*Yeah, I know it is actually a dinner jacket.  TMI.  Forcryinoutloud.